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Archive for the ‘airports’ Category

You’re 64.  You are returning from a trip that has you bringing home vodka as a souvenir. 

What would possess you to chug that two pints of vodka?  What possible explanation could there be for such behavior? 

  • A gun to the head?
  • A tightening vice to the scrotum? 
  • Being forced to watch a 12-hour Rosie O’Donnell marathon? 

What about a pesky airport fee for checking a carry-on bag? 

“… he was told at a security check that he would have to either throw out the bottle of vodka or pay a fee to have his carry-on bag checked.  Instead, he chugged the vodka, and was quickly unable to stand or otherwise function, police said.”

Well… yeah. 

That would have to be one heck of an airport fee to make me risk getting extremely ill and spending a few days in the hospital.  (Putting the risk of death aside for a moment of course… )

How do you get to be 64 years old and not realize that chugging two pints of vodka is going to f&#* you up?  Anyone? 

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Airport security is a joke…

I am still waiting for my delayed Halifax-Fredericton flight.  I happened to meet Lee Thomas while sitting drinking beer at the Halifax airport.

After the second delayed announcement I went back out through security to have a cigarette.  The time I took my laptop out, emptied my pockets and walked through without issue.  The second time I came through the same security gate but through a different metal detector. 

 I beeped!  I got the once over with the hand metal detector… My belt beeped, my hair clip beeped, my ankle bracelet beeped. 

Why didn’t it the first time??  I have no idea. 

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